Discouraged----Energy

You might not have been able to tell by my post last week that I wasn't having such a swell time. Basically last week I was depressed and discouraged. Several things, thoughts, ideas, had been building up for a while and for several days I was "down" and not myself. On Wednesday things climaxed (this is sounding like a novel!) when we had our staff set-up meeting. I look forward to this time where we talk about how Underground is going, and pray for each other. We usually go around saying how we're doing, and what we'd like prayer for. Usually, even when I'm having a rough week, I still see a positive side to things, and remember God's goodness. Usually when I say how I'm doing I present the positive side too. This week I said straight up "I'm discouraged". No positive spin on it. What was really dissapointing was that no one noticed enough to personally encourage me. And I didn't want to pry it out of people, if you know what I mean.

On Thrusday I dedided to talk with Richard about it, and am really glad I did so. Rich is always so good at recieving feed back. We talked about how, beccause I almost always look like I'm doing fine, people assume I will pull myself up. I explained how I'm weaker than I look, and need people's support. "Pity the man who has no one to pick him up when he falls". Rich was encouraging, and without me prying stuff out of him ;), said just what I needed to hear. He also encouraged me in taking a complete day off each week, which I'd been thinking about for a while. Yay!

I'm stil thinking alot about this whole commuity thing, and how much we need each other, and interdependence, and trusting in God, and endurance, and encouraging each other, and how they all fit together. "Interpersonal" stuff.

I learned this week that I definetly appreciate people who care about how I'm doing, and that I can be honest about what's up, and tell people plainly when I'm not doing well.

Oh, and, fitting with my emotional health I was sick all week. Amazingly, I'm doing well now, even after an all nighter 30hr famine.

I had been dreading the 30 hr famine (us Treaders were involved with it a Courtenay Middle School). Friday thankfully I woke up feeling more like myself, and was glad to have hard workers around to keep me going as we set up. After the "gym blast" kick off, different activites were availible throughout the night: bounce mania thing, open gym, movies, x-box, braceltets, etc.

Surprisingly the hardest hour was 10-11 as I tried to sleep and wondered how I would make it through the night/morning. After than, majorly praying for strength!, I enjoyed getting to know some girls, playing 21, monopoly and talking. It was so neat to get to know three girls in partifular-- they were three beutiful grade 7s, the kind of girls who I would hang out with if I were in thier grade seven class, I guess they are still the girls I'd hang out with, even though I'm not int their class ;)

We had fun laughing, dealing with overtiredness, talking about books, and favourites thises and thats....etc. A memorable moment was rolling on the flour at like 5:15 am, thinking about how comical it was, here me, a college student, rolling on a middle school halway, and loving it...and being overtired!

With these girls, and the other perifery ones who came and went, I definetly "found my groove". I'm not into the big group stuff, but hanging out with them, and checking in on our crew was my energy supply.

A week gone by...

I have been being haunted by a stinking cold all week and am trying so hard to get rid of it, but it just seems to be sneaking up to kill me. So I’ve officially decided that I will have to take a one week vacation in which whatever homework I should have gotten done is now cancelled. However, I’m not sure how I’m going to convince James and Dr. E. of this one. Maybe they will have pity upon my poor soul.

The major event of this week was definitely the 30 Hour Famine at Courtenay Middle School. As Karen said, we did the Gym Blast, which she did a super job of getting everything all set up (Nice job Karen, it rocked!) and making sure it all ran smoothly. Because of this cranky cold that I have, I was super tired by about 10:00 and thankfully, was able to go take a sleep in the van for a while. Without those random resting periods throughout the night I would have been dead by about 11:00 for sure! There sure were a lot of things to do and I think that the kids really had a good time. One thing I was disappointed in was the fact that nothing was really stressed about what the Famine is all about. It sort of seemed like the actual Famine time was just a great big party, with no thought going to why these kids were doing what they were doing. That was sad to see, but I hope that next year they will do more things to recognize what the Famine really is about.

This week was also our last week of classes. It was really strange sitting in class and knowing that it would be the last time that I would be sitting in a Tread class. Because I have decided to move on to Prairie next year, I wont be back in Tread next year. It’s been hard knowing that these are the last few days here with my roomies and hanging out with these people that I’ve been sharing the last year of my life with. Fortunately I’ll be around all summer and can keep growing those friendships with these people, but it will still be hard. I must say that this last year has been amazing, even with all its difficult times. There has been so much cool stuff that I have learned!
See ya again next week! :D

I am...... alive, Lindsay?

This week went bye real fast, it is Saturday all ready. Didn’t get out much this week and I wasn’t able to go for a jog either so that was a little disappointing. I spent a lot of time working in the library or at home on homework. I was able to go for a date with the girls have a few short walks and help out with the 30 hour famine at Courtney Middle.

I had planned the line up for the gym blast for the thirty hour famine and was a little nervous as to whether or not the kids would enjoy the games I picked. I received a lot of help from James, Brian, and Barry while planning for the gym blast and for that I am very thankful. Karissa did a good job at score keeping especially because it was a little chaotic with everyone running around. Lindsay, Jeff, Barry, and Tony did an excellent job of being team leaders, and James well he was all over the place doing a good job. Josh was the speaker who introduced the games; he did an amazing job of getting the kids excited, and making sure the games were well explained. The importance of team effort was seen in the gym blast. Everyone played there own role and worked as a team; it was great to see how it all turned out. Besides the gym blast there was also other fun things that we were involved in. I really enjoyed the lazar tag outside in the rain. For lazar tag they had blown up inflatable’s to hide behind. I had brought an extra pair of clothes so I had fun getting soaked in the rain. I also had a fun time helping in the gym, although when the night got late I was feeling a little zoned out. I was also able to play floor hockey, basketball, dodge ball, and other fun gym activities, I also watched part of the movie “Over the Hedge” for a break (you know I am tired when I watch this movie because I don’t like this movie very much). There was a pancake breakfast in the morning. I would definitely help out with a thirty hour famine again, it was a lot fun!

When I got home this morning I took a nice long nap and then yes you guessed it, back to homework!

(Our date on thursday night)

Tagged

So thanks to Jill, I am now tagged and have to fill out this delightful little thing (which is really okay because I'm in need of a break from life right now anyways). Here we go!

Three Things I'm Afraid Of:
1. being rejected
2. moths flying at my face
3. giving up on something that I shouldn't have given up on

Three People Who Make Me Laugh:
1. Karen and Lindsay (they count as one because they're my roomies)
2. Elsah (Yay sister)
3. and anyone who says something that might possibly be funny around 4 in the morning after I've been laughing for three hours already on the way home from Prairie.

Three Things I Love:
1. smiles
2. singing
3. and having a really, really, really, good time with friends and family

Three Things I hate:
1. when someone lets you down
2. eating fish!
3. watching someone suffer

Three Things I Don't Understand:
1. those who suffer from others mistakes
2. spelling
3. how in the world they get the caramel inside the caramel bar

Three Things On My Desk:
1. I don't have a desk
2. so I guess you could count my bed as a desk, because that is where I do my work
3. so that means that I'm on my desk right now :P

Three Things I'm Doing Right Now:
1. talking to my brother on MSN
2. reading a song that my brother wrote for me (isn't that the coolest thing ever?!)
3. listening to a really bad version of All Creatures of Our God and King and wishing it wasn't on

Three Things I Want to Do Before I Die:
1. get married (which includes having fun, being pregnant, raising kids, and all that joyful stuff)
2. travel to a whole whack of places around the world (including Rome)
3. sing in the rain and not get cold while doing it

Three Things I can Do:
1. Sing
2. make dinner (more than just KD too)
3. make people smile/laugh

Three Things I Can't Do:
1. play the bass (but I want to learn)
2. play sports (but I want to learn)
3. drive a motorcycle (but I want to learn)

Three Things I Think You Should Listen To:
1. laughter
2. Prelude, C-Sharp Minor, by S. Rachmaninoff
3. rain on a tin roof

Three Things You Should Never Listen To:
1. fingers on a chalk board
2. people laughing or talking really loud right outside your door at 6:30 in the morning while you are trying to sleep
3. a whiner

Three Things I'd like to learn: (other than the three things up above that I want to learn)
1. how to live like Jesus
2. how to do a front and back flip on the trampoline
3. sew really well

Three Favorite Foods:
1. Crab (well fake crab) Fettuccini
2. Ice cream (Vanilla with a little scoop of Peanut butter)
3. my mom's pizza, hamburgers, and stir-fry

Three Shows I Watched As a Kid:
1. Magic School Bus
2. Sesame Street
3. Wishbone

Three Things I Regret:
1. not always being myself but letting the thoughts of others influence me
2. not journaling better as a young teenager
3. not taking my parents advice as often as I should

Three People I Want to Tag:
1. Karen
2. Lindsay
3. Jade

Haha, I finished! Now I'm going to take a nap becuase I'm dog tired and have to stay up all night tonight!

He is risen!!!

This week was an interesting week. At first it started off slow and I was feeling overwhelmed with homework and I still am, but not as much. This week has seemed very slow and I have been feeling down, that I can’t really explain. I think it has partly to do with the fact that I am tired, have lots to do before I head home, and even heading home for the summer has been weighing heavily on me, but God is good and I know I will survive. This weekend was Easter and what a good Easter I had. The Langdale family invited me to stay at there home for the weekend. I had a fun time hanging out with them and it was a relaxing time.

On Friday we went to Isfeild for the Good Friday service. Before the service I went for a jog and as I was standing by the river talking with God I was able to meet a girl I have never seen before. Her name is Michele Brown and she made my day. She happened to be walking behind me and somehow I ended up scaring her because she didn’t see me standing where I was. Scaring people is a good way of starting a conversation, we talked for a while. She was so friendly and her smile and friendly conversation, as I said before, made my day. As I was jogging back I thanked God that I was able to talk with this girl and I asked Him if there was a reason that He had placed her there at that time. As it happens while I was at the Good Friday service this question was answered. As I was watching a reenactment of Jesus’ death on the cross it struck me and God told me, it’s people like Michele that I want you to bring to know my name, it’s people like Michele that I long to be close to my heart, and I died that she might have life. Wow neat, God is so amazingly awesome. This girl Michele, who was so friendly, a real breath of fresh air, needs God and my duty is to introduce her to God. God desires more then anything that we be happy, but that we share a close relationship with Him and that we find our joy in Him.

On Sunday morning I went with the Langdale family to Goose Spit to watch the sunrise! I have never actually sat down at a beach and watched the sunrise, it was amazing! I didn’t know that for some people that getting up on Sunday to watch the sunrise was a tradition on Easter morning. I think that I am going to make that a “must” for my family tradition. The clouds were out, so that when the sun rose it made beautiful colours of pink, and orange on them. I got some pictures of the sunrise and last night I downloaded them on my computer and I looked through them at least five times, they were so beautiful. God is soooo creative!

I have had a wonderful time at the Langdale’s and they definitely spoiled me this Easter. I am thankful that God has surrounded me with many people that open up there houses to me and enjoy having me around and I them.

Well I think I have talked myself out, so I will talk again soon!

Palm-Resurrection

Let's do this week day by day:
-Monday, homework, and then fire at the beach with Hamps, which was fun:) I'm liking the nicer weather
-tues. D-team we had an easter egg hunt, and then I enjoyed dinner at my mom's. I also got spend time with a man named Henry, who James' and Sonya know. He talked about how knowing the truth of God set's us free, and so if we're not free, it must be that we're believing a lie. I aslo enjoyed a really good walk and talk with Sonya.
-wed. YU went well. Good conversations, and Karissa and I's lesson went well. It was no neat to see how God made it all flow nice and smooth.
-thrus. staff meeting, and then visit with Simona, which was neat.
-Friday to Monday I was at my mom's with a visit with my dad in Nanaimo on Sat with Julia.
At the good friday serviceI was reminded of the incredible sacrifice that Jesus made. And as I thought about it more over the weekend, I reflected on how I'm so gratefull things didn't end there. Yes, after friday, I would be forgiven, but the Sunday resurrection means I can have newness of life, and not just stay stuck in the old dead, grumpy, rotteness.
I enjoyed good food and time to read at my mom's. A highlight was also a visit with Jen on Sunday. Those conversations we have, when we discuss what we're learning, and likeing, and wanting, and enjoying and being frusterated with.
Monday, I got sick, and spent a lot of time on my bed reading.
When I get sick it's usually an indication that I'm worn out, and need some down time, and this wasn't an exception.
I'm back at Hamps now, and starting another week...I wonder what it will bring...

A truely great God

What a fantastic week! It seemed that this actual week went so quickly and then the weekend came and it was sweet. On Monday we had our last ‘official’ Intercultural Studies class, the only thing left to do is the 30 Hour Famine with a bunch of crazy middle schoolers. Tuesday’s history class was interesting (and somewhat confusing I will admit) and great job on the presentation Jeff. On Wednesday night Lindsay and I gave our presentation on our part of the scroll. It was really cool because what we were talking about lined right up with Easter. God is so cool how He does stuff like that. Lindsay and I were pretty excited that He did that. :D
After youth group was over I went home with my family and we got up at 4:30 the next morning to get the 6:30 ferry so that we could spend as much time as possible in Kamloops. We spent the remainder of Thursday and all of Friday with Kelsey and Brandon. On Saturday we headed off to Pritchard and did some great visiting. ;) On Sunday I got to play with Kelsey and Brandon and their worship team for church. It was really great to play with them again; I miss that a lot. After church Liz, Corey and Justin and Kelsey and Brandon’s friend Matt from church all came over for Easter dinner and the afternoon. I actually managed to find some time to study in there too (it wasn’t the best studying environment, but hey *shrug*).
All in all we had a fantastic time and I am so thankful to God that I was able to go. He blesses me so much and I am grateful that I was able to visit my family for Easter.

Sun!!!

So this week was a good week. There where a few days of sun, and wind, and yes for a short while a little snow fall. I was able to go for two jogs this week as well as two walks on the beach and another walk on a walking trail. Wow, thank God for legs! I was excited this week at D-team when I was listening to Lindsay’s and Josh’s lesson. Josh and Lindsay were talking about bringing God glory, and one way that I bring glory to God is by using my gift of running because God has given me legs to run. Cool eh? I remember that when I was around seventeen, my mom had told me that God was watching me and smiling when He saw me running because I was using a talent that He had given me; I have never forgot that. Now every time I run I can see God smiling and I thank Him for healthy working legs. How do you bring God glory through your different talents?

This week has really tested my thoughts about were I stand in regards to how much I have been changing. Going home for the summer has been heavily weighing on my heart. I have realized this week more than others that I really love what I am doing here in B.C.! I believe as I return home that what I am learning will test me and how much I have grown in my relationship with Christ. I am both excited, but scared at the same time. God knows my thoughts and I am so glad that I am not doing this on my own. Isn’t it great that we have a God who is always there?

This week as weird as it was, was very busy and once again I am thankful for busy weeks. I was feeling a little stressed out with all the homework, but I know that I will make it with God’s help even though sometimes I do complain a lot!

(Junxion on Saturday night)

Well that is all I have to say for now, bye bye!

Simplified?

This week I was reveiwing this year in my mind, and thinking about stuff that has happened and what I've learned. Maybe you'll think I'm weird for this, but I find if fascinating to analyse why I react to certain things, and how my emotional and rational faculties work. This has to do with a Theology project I'm working on with poertry, collage and 3-d stuff, which I'm excited about.


I enjoyed a good time at the Bowlers on Sunday, great to eat and discuss some fun and serious questions together. I also had a good walk and talk with Caitlin on Wed.


Josh and I did the Underground lesson for Wed, and I thought it went well. I was encouraged to see the girls in my small group working so well together.


Thurs-Saturday I was babysitting at the Mansels. It was good to have a change of location, and enjoy the simplicity of little kids' lives. As I delighted in the precious litle moments with the boys, I found myself refreshed. How often to we remember that swings, and sand, and jumping, and couning to one-hundred, and eating and apple are exciting?!

I also had fun with Elsah, looking at pictures, singing and talking. Man, she was helpful!

Saturday, Junxion was good (gathering of different youth groups), and Sunday I went again to Bowser church.


Today for lunch it was neat to go and visit with Mr. and Mrs. Rendal. They work in South/ Central America. Though nothing they talked about really twigged my interest, it was neat to discuss with them their work in prisons, and some of my history.





The thought that has been jumping in my brain lattely is about contentment. Izi and Eli lived so much in the momment, it was refreshing. Why is it that we so often want to be where we aren't? I'm not assured even of tommorow, so why not "stop and smell the roses"? The days have been beautiful and sunny (and hail a bit!), which brightens up life in general. I am so blessed...